Cleanliness is my new Obsession

I took a shower today.

And before you applaud or sigh in relief or any other comical response I would normally find oh-so-funny if I didn’t constantly smell like baby spit and diapers, today’s shower is amazing because I didn’t have to

A. sing the entire time to assure my baby that I still exist and she was not, in fact, alone in the universe.

B. turn the temperature of the water just a touch colder than I like because some little girl decided at the last minute to join me. Or

C. have the following conversation while drafts of cold air enter my shower space:
“Have you seen my sweater?”
“What sweater?”
“You know, the black one with the shoulder detailing.”
“Do I know that sweater?”
“Yeah, you know I wore it to that party we went to with the girl you like.”
“I don’t remember that.”
“No, you know, that party, at the house with the thing…come one, you have to remember.”
“I have no idea what party. Or what sweater. Can I finish my shower now?”
Stomps off grumpy, leaving the bathroom door open so any bit of my body not directly in the water stream gets hit with cold air.

But not today. Today I got clean without interruption, without frenzy, and without compromising my temperature preference. So, how did I get this amazing shower? The YMCA. After strollerobics I put both kids in childwatch and took a leisurely shower. Which means I’m using a gym locker room as my personal spa and retreat. My life is sooooo glamorous. This is truly NOT what I imagined adult life would be when I was 12. But I’m not going to think about it too much because I’m clean, I got some exercise, my kids were not neglected, and I’m feeling pretty damned relaxed. It’s a good day.

I just hope I don’t get athlete’s foot.