Preschool Pariah, part 2

So my friend was telling me about this little girl who acts out and how the other moms at preschool are freezing her and her mom out: no playdates, no invites, no outings.

"What does your preschool teacher have to say about this?"
"Nothing. The girl doesn't act out in school, so she has nothing to say about what people do out of school."
"Yeah, but she could. She could get the parents together and talk about this girl's developmental stage and how to handle it, she could help the mom know what to do when the girl acts out to show the other moms that the girl is being disciplined properly. She could do something about this dynamic between the moms to keep it from being such a clique."
"My preschool is a clique. And this teacher has worked there long enough to know that no matter how many tea parties she throws, the women are going to go back to 'the club' and talk shit anyway."

Which leads me to this thought. When you select a preschool, you do it based on price and hours and philosophy of the education and how much you like the teacher. But there is a social component as well that you can't really research, but that affects your family hugely. So far I've identified four types of school:

*the socialite school. This school is generally regarded as 'the best'. It will have full accreditation, be expensive, and when you say your child goes there, people will nod knowingly. Often the hours will be short or oddly inconvenient because who cares if the nanny is inconvenienced by pick-up time.
How this school affects you: Dress to impress. Never pick up or drop off in sweats unless they are a Juicy Couture matching set and you are 'off to meet your trainer'. Your child will need to be in outfits as well. Don't worry, they won't get dirty. The other parents wouldn't stand for messy activities. Watch out for backstabbing, gossiping, and exclusion. Benefits- starting the in-crowd early and plenty of fancy playdates with great snacks.

*the two income family school. This school has extended hours and flexible pick-up time. The teachers are usually relatively new and/or young and classes are large. Progress reports are written on fill in the blank forms and you won't necessarily be told about the little things (ex. lil johnny pushed or got pushed at the swing)
How this school affects you: the other parents are busy people, so don't expect to start great friendships or fill your social calendar with playdates. The teachers are focused on keeping the kids alive and stuffing a bit of knowledge in their heads-- overseeing social interactions and dynamics may be limited to 'don't push' and 'put down that baseball bat'. Watch out for your child's needs. If he or she is having a hard time with another kid or with learning, it may get lost or under reported. Worse, your child may be blamed instead of given tools and tactics to cope. If you school has started throwing around words like ADD in preschool, let it be a warning sign to you about the school, not the kids.

The hippy school. This school has short hours and a community feel. Everybody knows everybody and when a problem comes up, its discussed with the group and lots of solutions and teaching points are given to the parents. Classes are small and progress reports are handwritten and most of it is conveyed verbally. What to watch out for: if your child or YOU don't fit into the group or behave inappropriately (according to the school- for some schools inappropriate is sending the wrong snack) the school will boot you. In this environment, because you've gotten involved in the family like atmosphere, it will hurt.

The neighborhood school. The neighborhood school is a lot like the two income family school, except with shorter hours. Everybody picks up at the same time so you'll see the other parents more frequently, but oddly, that won't necessarily lead to more playdates and friendships. The neighborhood school, like the two income school, is a prep for public school and the paperwork, progress reports, class size, and dress code reflect it (ie clothes will get dirty during art or recess, progress reports will be impersonal, class size will be large.)

Anybody know of other tyypes of schools?